Category Archives: Articles

Articles

My Descent Into Synn – Guest Post

Miss Sadie Synn's journey into finding her authentic self.

Guest Post by Miss Sadie Synn

 

As a FemDom, it is empowering to stand above a kneeling submissive, as they kiss my boots or serve me. Surrendering control is one of the most precious gifts one can give. I love others giving that to me. The first part of my journey, I started as a slave but it was obvious that I wasn't fit for that role. I knew I was a dominant after that, but I had no confidence in myself.

As I started slowly progressing through my transition I realized that should become my primary focus. In 2014, I was able to begin hormone replacement therapy (HRT). I was blown away by how much change I experienced after just a year of HRT. In truth, it took so long because I had felt resigned to transitioning. Years later, I discovered this was due to PTSD from childhood abuse. I knew myself, but I had not found that certain je ne sais quoi. Although I needed to put myself out there as a Lifestyle Domme, I had no confidence in myself. I had been a hermit for the last five, years so I had absolutely nothing to lose! At worst there would be no change and my situation would be the same.

For the first six months of being a Domme in the lifestyle, it was rough. I didn’t know what I was doing. I had a background from the other side and lots of involvement assisting in scenes, but I no experience being the one in control. I needed to learn how to tactfully stick up for myself while subtly using my femininity. Then I had my first really hot scene. After negotiations, a masochist guided me through using canes. I was hooked.

Being a FemDom helps affirm my own femininity and that may be my favorite thing about it. I often hear trans-women talk about that affirmation from sex with a partner who truly sees them as them, as a woman. My history is complicated when it comes to sex. It carries emotional labor for me because my needs can’t be met.

That said, being a FemDom allows me to feel that affirmation without the emotional labor. That look in my slave’s eyes when they call me Mistress makes my soul sing. Allowing my natural feminine energy to flow through a scene or session erases all the years of physical and verbal trauma I experienced for just being me. What once was the bane of my existence became my strongest strength and it did wonders for my personal well-being. It allowed me to go through TSA with double D’s and an ID with my birth gender.

While serving my country and volunteering did make me feel good about myself, they didn’t let me respect me for who I was. Being a Femdom did. Being in control over submissives and slaves that consensually chose to kneel before me did. With my power being non-consensually taken from me as a child, having others surrender theirs willingly is some of the best therapy in the world.

 

Miss Sadie Synn is a Powerful, Statuesque, Intimidating lifestyle Domme. Standing 6'5"-- without heels--she enjoys using her Goddess-like allure to dominate her slaves. Sadie developed a passion for paddles while being trained in Austin ,TX. This led her to be a Master paddle maker, and her craftsmanship has been felt by many lucky bottoms in the mid-west. She specializes in: paddling, boot and body worship, tease and denial, violet wand play, and being a puppy handler. She is always looking to learn and explore.
 
Sadie has been interviewed by Dr. Sue Storm and for Broadly in Vice Magazine, along with an appearance on the Doctor Susan Block Show. Miss Sadie Synn is a Presenter, and board Liaison on Central Iowa Power Exchange. She volunteers weekly for the local PRIDE center, assisting with the largest LGBTQIA library in the area. Sadie operates a private dungeon doing shoots and sessions, in a quiet neighborhood in Central Iowa.
 
Find her personally at @SadieSynn or at her Dungeon @House_Of_Synn.
Articles

It’s Mixtrix’ World by Miss Kate

She could own you, if she wanted to.

It’s Her World, She Just Lets You Live in It

A Profile on MixTrix by Miss Kate

I don’t idolize Dommes because I’m afraid that I’m going to unconsciously (or consciously) rip off their style. This isn’t to say that I don’t admire or enjoy other Dommes work. I would be lying if I said I didn’t. There are a handful of Dommes that I admire greatly and who inspire me to explore things I may not have previously thought of. MixTrix is probably number one on my list of Dommes that inspire me. She so graciously allowed me to ask her a few questions on her world as a cruel with a sense of humor lifestyle and pro Domme.

 

The Beginning

Casual, Beautiful Mix

My first question was an obvious one: how and when did you discover you were Dominant? She says she did not start identifying as a Domme until later in life, not because she was anything else, but because she didn’t know that there was a word for what she was. She was vaguely aware of the term BDSM but didn’t really know what it was outside of what the media portrayed it as. “My own fetish sexual proclivities led me to the world of femdom, I realized what I had been doing all along and who I already was had a NAME. I had NO idea all this stuff I was into was even a “thing.” Some of it was stuff I thought was just MY weird thing”.

When did she start this professionally then? She started real time sessions about eight years ago and got involved in online Femdom/Findom almost five years ago. When she did enter the online realm, she of course gravitated towards the fetish side of things, seeing as how her own sexual predilections ran to the fetish side. But she is quick to point out that she was late to the party in the technology department.

“There is only so much online search you can do for those kinds of kinks … where it is only a woman giving it to a man before you run into Femdom over and over. I discovered these things I was naturally into had a whole scene built around them called Femdom. And in my own personal relationships I was already practicing Findom without even realizing… it had a name or scene… once I saw what was going on I was like, oh holy shit, this is what I already do! I can and should be doing this.”

 

 

Domme Style

MixTrix counts exposure, dirty talk, human ashtray and furniture, spit fetish, mental and financial domination, CFNM, objectification of all types, watersports, and verbal humiliation as some of her specialties. In fact, it was her love of spitting that made me explore spit fetish. I had never thought about it before I started seeing her Twitter posts featuring it. Not too long after I saw her spit gifs, a sub came to me asking for spit play, which I was more than happy to oblige in. And low and behold, I enjoyed in immensely.

Of course, what activities she does will absolutely vary from sub to sub. That’s the way it should be. While some things might be fun with one sub, it might not be so much with another. And how should you approach her: Make it all about her. What are her favorite and least favorite parts about being a Domme? It’s the power exchange and interacting with her boys and the drama and in-fighting the he scene, respectively. Things I can relate to completely. I often wonder why there this dichotomy in our community: it’s either all love or it cat-fighting.

As part of her online sessions, she says she loves domination sessions via skype. She has even written a little Femdom Skype tutorial. Out of curiosity, I ordered her Skype lesson. While most of it was standard fare for me because I have been conducting online Skype sessions for about a year, I did pick up a few new tips and is a must read for all those newly into the world of online sessions. I highly recommend it if you’re new to online Femdom or new to Skype sessions.

 

Fun Femdom Fact

Ballbusting: I find kneeing men in the balls is more fun than just kicking them because I can get closer and be right in his face. It adds a different more intimate sort of dynamic and the eye contact goes a long way.

 

 

 

Lessons We Can Learn from MixTrix

Very curious, I asked if there was something she had learned that she had wished someone would have told her before entering Dommehood. While she couldn’t think of something off the top of her head, she did say that she thought learning things the hard way, through good old trial and error, is sometimes the best way to learn. Hardest lesson she has learned? You can only count on yourself.

What about a few pieces of advice that she could offer someone considering becoming either a pro or lifestyle

Domme? Without a doubt, it’s to learn and educate yourself about what you are doing as far as fetishes and kinks go. Those kinks are triggers that can help you dominate your sub better. Another piece of advice? Don’t bother engaging in any aspect that you are not comfortable with or that you’re not into yourself. And lastly, don’t do any of it purely for the money or you will end up hating it. Do it for the fun first and then enjoy getting money for the things you find fun. All solid pieces of advice.

My personal thoughts on whether one is born with a dominance trait or if it can be taught tend to lean towards the school of thought: “If ya got it, ya got it”. This is one of my favorite questions to ask other Dommes and I was excited to hear what MixTrix thought. Her thoughts ring similar to mine. “I believe it is something you either are or are not. It is an orientation thing, not an affectation. I believe a person can learn to TOP another, but Domming is inherent.”

 

Will She Be Mentoring Anyone Any Time Soon?

As I mentioned, I don’t really look up to any Dommes. But I did ask Mixtrx if she has someone she looked up to, someone that inspires her to be a better Domme, or a mentor. Not exactly, she says. She says she doesn’t look at things in an individual way, instead she prefers to think collectively. And collectively, she finds all the ladies inspiring, “They all do something sooner or later that makes me say “way to go, you rocked that”.

She, herself also has no interest in mentoring anyone, although she does get asked daily. This doesn’t surprise me in the least. Like I said, she is number one on my list of inspiring Dommes.

 

Personal Time and Self-Care

She points out that her personal and work life, hobbies, sexual interests, and having fun are all one and the same. Working for her isn’t the same as what it may be for other’s working in the same field. She does note that she doesn’t own a smartphone. While she is at home, she spends plenty of time on the internet. The last thing she wants while she’s out for dinner or playing tennis is to be tied to the online world.

She unabashedly says that she engages in whatever pleases her or makes her feel good, pointing out that it has always been a lifelong habit. One thing she does relish in and can’t get enough of: going for long walks by herself. She has so many people vying for her time and she wants some of it too, so she always makes sure she gets it.

 

What is the color of money?

Without a doubt, it is green. Green is the color of envy of course, and money is often the foundation for envy. But green also symbolizes growth and money is the power to grow your options. So, I think of it as green. Plus, I am an American, so green is LITERALLY money color here, which made my answer pretty easy lol.

 

 

As a little tongue and cheek way to end the interview I like to ask a few silly questions. What does she want to be when she grows up? When does she plan on becoming an adult? Does she have an exit strategy? And how lucky does she consider herself? She amusingly says that she was born an adult. She wants to be the “me” she already is when she grows up. It’s Domme ’til death for her. And that she is an extremely lucky person. “The obvious reason is that my lifestyle, hobby, and work are all one and the same. That would make anyone lucky. Beyond that, fortune smiles on me always. And even the bad things are simply a lead up to good ones coming down the road.”

 

Check out MixTrix on Twitter here or at her website here.

Articles

A Lesbian Domme Who Dominates Men – Guest Post by Goddess Cassidy

 

 

How Can a Lesbian Dominate a Man?

Guest Post by Goddess Cassidy

Of all the ways I surprise strange men on the Internet, being a lesbian Domme is the one thing that shocks them the most. Although I am not an extreme rarity, I have noticed that lesbians who dominate men are a minority. Yes, it is unconventional. But it is completely and totally worth it.

Let us get something out of the way right now . . . Dominating men does not get me sexually aroused. That should not come as a surprise, but I have encountered many men online who were downright appalled that I would be a Domme for a living and not enjoy it sexually. I have even been called fake for it. Here is the thing though: There are tons of Dommes who are attracted to men and do not get turned on by their sessions. Why? Well, because it is their job, and it is not necessary for us to get turned on to succeed at what we do.

I always tell skeptics that, if anything, it is a strength. Never chancing the distraction of attraction makes it easy to keep a level head and concentrate on my job. Of course, that in no way means I think I am better than Dommes who are attracted to men. But I also do not think I am a lesser Domme because of my sexual orientation.

For some subs, it makes it even more exciting knowing that they would never in a million years be able to have me. Whatever little fantasies they come up with in their heads have absolutely zero chance of becoming a reality. It can sometimes be an extra fun way to torment them. However, for other subs who attempt to contact me, it can make them irrationally angry.

 

"For some subs, it makes it even more exciting knowing that they would never in a million years be able to have me."

 

For instance, I once did a Kik session with a man and before we began, I asked what his limits were and I told him mine. Then in the middle of the session, he starts making me quite uncomfortable. He asks me if he can touch himself, and I tell him not yet. Nothing out of the ordinary there. Just being a Domme and exercising my right to tease and torment. Then he starts saying rather inappropriate things to me. He tells me that if he was with me, he would fuck me. I immediately shut him down and told him exactly what I thought of his nasty comments. He apologized, and I decided that if he could behave himself, the session could continue. He agreed, and then starts getting angry that I have not let him touch himself. Before I can tell him to go to hell, my timer goes off and the session is over. He is extremely angry and tells me that I am awful at my job. I tell him that if he would have behaved himself, he would have had more time to enjoy the session.

Now, this situation would not have been okay in any case, even with a straight Domme. However, I firmly believe that having the knowledge of my orientation made him attempt to push things further than he should have. There are always men who think they can get away with things and love trying to push lesbian Dommes to do things they are not comfortable with. I have even had strange subs on the internet threaten to track me down and force themselves on me to turn me straight. Quite an unsettling DM to receive.

Being a lesbian Domme who dominates men is an interesting ride. We are a small group, often accused of being fake, threatened, etc. But we are also incredibly strong women who know that, for some subs, we are adding to the excitement, therefore making our careers thrive beyond our wildest dreams.

My name is Goddess Cassidy! I'm a sassy, smart, and sexy 21-year-old American girl. I've been a dominant lady my whole life, but I've been a professional online Domme for a couple years now. In addition to domination, I've been selling panties and other fetish items since I was 18. My career as a clip producer began at that time as well. I'm great at what I do, and I have such a fun time doing it!

Find me at:

https://t.co/ot5FGOmmJ8

https://t.co/hOTHNPwL6v

https://t.co/MyPtcefbDo

https://t.co/Fo7AumQ4LW

Articles

Top Dropping – Dommes Can Drop Too by Miss Kate

Yes, a Domme is a Real Human, with Real Human Emotions

By Feature Writer Miss Kate

I am sure anyone reading this is well aware of the term “sub dropping”. For those of you who are new, it is the state that can happen after a sub leaves subspace. During subspace, the body releases all type of feel good hormones and chemicals, often giving them a “high” feeling. It can last anywhere from hours to days. And they usually do not want to leave the wonderful blissful state they are in.

However, what goes up, must come down

As the sub’s endorphins drop, there can be a mixed bag of things going on from physical to emotional. A drop can happen even after just one session. They may get the blues, they may feel aches and pains, tiredness, and the list goes on. The way the endorphins leave the body so rapidly can be likened to a hangover or an opiate withdrawal. Sometimes, it can even lead into a depression. This is why aftercare is so very important. There are different degrees of drop, but I will save that for another time.

The Top Drop

What is often lesser known or talked about however, is Top dropping. Yes, Tops can drop. I will be honest, in my whole six-year career as a Pro-Domme, I had never even heard of Top drop. That is, until I dropped myself. I had no clue what the hell was going on. All I knew was that, out of nowhere, I got deeply upset. I started to rant and rave to a few close friends that I was a terrible Domme and that I was quitting altogether. I was truly baffled by my feelings. Until someone in my group privately messaged me and told me what was up! She said “Look, you’re fine. You’re just dropping.”. Of course, my natural reaction was, “What? No, I am not. Tops don’t drop”. She then gently explained to me how and why Tops can drop.

Well of course Tops can drop. Sometimes, it is easy to forget that we are, in fact, mere humans. Whether you are a lifestyle, pro, or both, sometimes it is easy for your ego to get inflated, especially when you are constantly being put on a pedestal. When you are constantly the one in the driver’s seat, calling all the shots, it is easy to go on a power trip. It itself can give you a high. A lifestyle Domme can feel it a bit more roughly because play sessions are going to have a huge element of intimacy to it. But even a Domme who is strictly pro can have an intense session where emotions run high, endorphins a-flowing adrenaline a-pumping. Afterwards, something just seems . . . amiss. I have heard Dommes describe it as feeling “weird” before.

Symptoms of  Top dropping?

Essentially, they are the same as a sub drop. Both Tops and subs experience euphoria during a session, and both can experience sadness, anxiety, and worry afterwards. But there is one glaring difference: Top drops often include feelings of guilt. Perhaps there are feelings of crossing a line, or that you may have been to rough, possibly you were a little bit too intense.

What Can a Top Do?

So, if aftercare is important in easing a sub out of subspace gently and hopefully minimizing the chance of a drop, what can a Top do to prevent or while dropping? I am not too sure if there are many preventive measures, per se, since you never know how a scene will play out. But while your dropping you must primarily recognize it for what it is; a drop. Take part in activities that engage you; read a book; watch a comedy; occupy yourself with your hobby; take general “me” time. This, too, shall pass. Do not think of giving in or up. Do not change your practise of doing things if it is what works for you. And if you are feeling super intense or depressed, communicate with your sub (if possible). Despite them being your submissive, they do realize you are human and have human emotions.

And lastly, just like you would make sure your sub was well hydrated and has had a healthy meal, make sure you do that yourself.